You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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