that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I wish you could order shots online.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize