I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
