Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Randomize
