I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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