should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
