yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
