I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize