dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I think a kid would responsible me up
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
