My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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