I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
