No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize