..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
