Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Can I color on your dick again?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
