where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
worst night to have a conscience
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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