this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
