Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize