these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
