lets start a swedish sibling band together
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize