that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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