I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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