what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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