Don't you send me to vm
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Randomize
