They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
