we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
