are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
