he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
