All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
