Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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