so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
