thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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