if you like me you must not know who I am
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
