I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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