Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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