Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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