We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
