i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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