Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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