So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
