so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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