I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
