Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize