I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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