found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize