I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
