nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
