is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
