Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
