R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
