then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
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