I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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